What sort of lead do you give ...

I wonder if you concur with me, this is a tough reading and call by Joab?

A bit of background, ever so briefly. Absalom has raised up for himself an army, ever so deceitfully and tactfully, against his own father, the king, David. A battle takes place and Absalom is killed. But here's the thing, David is torn between the victory that is his in the defeat of an enemy, albeit his son, and the fact that his troops return home safely. 

Here's the account:

2 Samuel 19:1-8 (NLT)

Joab Rebukes the King

19 Word soon reached Joab that the king was weeping and mourning for Absalom. ² As all the people heard of the king’s deep grief for his son, the joy of that day’s victory was turned into deep sadness. ³ They crept back into the town that day as though they were ashamed and had deserted in battle. ⁴ The king covered his face with his hands and kept on crying, “O my son Absalom! O Absalom, my son, my son!”

⁵ Then Joab went to the king’s room and said to him, “We saved your life today and the lives of your sons, your daughters, and your wives and concubines. Yet you act like this, making us feel ashamed of ourselves. ⁶ You seem to love those who hate you and hate those who love you. You have made it clear today that your commanders and troops mean nothing to you. It seems that if Absalom had lived and all of us had died, you would be pleased. ⁷ Now go out there and congratulate your troops, for I swear by the Lord that if you don’t go out, not a single one of them will remain here tonight. Then you will be worse off than ever before.”

⁸ So the king went out and took his seat at the town gate, and as the news spread throughout the town that he was there, everyone went to him.

Meanwhile, the Israelites who had supported Absalom fled to their homes.

I wonder where you might have placed your emphasis, your emotions? Would it be in celebration for your own troops returning as victors (this victory is yours), or might you be somewhat torn at the loss of your own son (though an enemy by his own making and action)?

The jury is out on this for me in some respects, for I am a strong believer in the fact that your (my) children are always your (my) children and you love them unconditionally (ie. whether they return the love, receive the love or not, you ALWAYS love them, regardless). It doesn't mean you like all of their life choices or the decisions they exercise. It does mean you might have to exercise grace, much and often.

However, here is the issue that Joab raises, David (King), you are the leader of these people. You might be torn with the loss of your son, this flesh and blood of yours who made his own choices and has suffered the consequences. But, don't loose sight of the people who have honoured you, faithfully served you, who were willing to give up their lives for you if necessary. Watch, because you have the responsiblity to look out for and look after, them too.

'Lord, here's my prayer through this. Help me ALWAYS to love my children, to protect them, direct and guide them, to lead by example for them. When it comes to leading well the people you have placed in my care, help me to be wise and lead well, that I might honour them and be a true example to them, encouraging and praising them appropriately , for Your Kingdom sake.'